Why I Don’t Do Black Friday

I love to shop. I especially love to shop when I know I’ll be getting a great deal. But you won’t find me anywhere near a retail store this Friday (or this Thursday either…I think stores being open on Thanksgiving is appalling.)

So why is a shopping-obsessed bargain hunting fashionista like myself hibernating in her home on one of the biggest shopping days of the year? Because having spent many years in the past working in retail, I know first hand that Black Friday brings out the absolute worst in humanity. Hell, some of the people who shop on this day don’t behave anything like a human. They are more like rabid dogs. Rabid dogs suffering from a lack of sleep and ready to snap at the first fellow shopper or salesperson who dares to get in their way.

Every Black Friday, I see news reports showing idiotic people trampling other (idiotic) people just to be the first to lay hands on a heavily discounted flat screen television. I feel like I’m in Rome, watching an ancient bloodsport competition. What is wrong with people? Remember the woman who maced other shoppers at Walmart and calmly walked off with the discounted X-box?

Having to ask the question, “what is wrong with people” is also the reason I don’t go to movies anymore and would rather schedule a mouthful of root canals than step foot in a Walmart. Nobody has respect for other people anymore. People have forgotten how to be polite, how to be civil.

Another reason I wouldn’t get near a store on Black Friday is out of respect for the poor retail workers. It’s one last person they have to deal with. Working in retail is the absolute worst because you have to deal with assholes on a daily basis. (I’m actually writing a book about my years of working in retail because I have so many ridiculous “people behaving badly” stories.) I left retail for good several years ago when a woman complained to the store manager that I was being “racist” because we didn’t have the sunglasses she wanted in stock.

So while I do plan on shopping the hell out of Cyber Monday, this Friday I’ll be lounging around my house in a food coma, organizing my closet, and praying for all of my friends who work in retail this year.

If you happen to be brave enough to venture out on this dark day, just remember two very important things: be careful, and be kind.

Better yet, why not avoid the crowds all together and shop the Stylaphile 2015 Guide to Gift Giving? 100 hand-picked stylish items in all price ranges just a click away. It’s the easiest holiday shopping you’ll ever do.
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